Depression Is Keeping Me in Bed and Stealing My Mornings
Last updated: October 2022
I recently had a drastic change in my sleep schedule and I was so thankful for it. Now I am afraid I am going to revert to my old patterns. I just got used to getting a decent amount of sleep most nights and now I think it might be slipping away due to depression.
It had been years since I actually slept at night, and I often complained that I felt like I had no time in the day to do anything. I was sleeping my life away. It made my life feel empty and my days feel unproductive. It added to my depression and fueled my anxiety.
Finding it hard to get out of bed each day
Now I feel depression creeping back in and I am waking up a wee bit later each day. I am finding it harder to get out of bed in the mornings. I spent a couple of weeks practically springing out of bed, eager to meet the day and get things done. That appears to be waning.
I no longer jump out of bed at 7 or 8 in the morning. It has inched later and later and now I am dragging myself out of bed near 9. I have to talk myself into getting out of bed, and this change is disappointing. It also tells me my depression is deepening.
Losing productivity and gaining anxiety and depression
While it bothers me that I am losing out on the productive mornings that made me happy, I am fearful of the changes in my mental health. I do have a lot going on right now that would add to my anxiety, but I was hoping changes wouldn’t happen as fast as it is.
I feel a dark cloud moving in, and it only makes it harder to get out of bed. Not getting up and getting things done in the morning adds to my depression. My depression makes it hard to get up and get things done in the morning. Is there any way to win this war to keep my mornings?
Trying to keep a routine despite struggles with depression
I miss the mornings when I practically leaped out of bed and was anxious to get the day started. Now I am dragging myself out of bed and begrudgingly starting the day’s tasks. I miss the joy of getting up early and feeling like I had a full day ahead. That has been absent for days now, and I truly miss it.
Regardless, I am still dragging myself out of bed as early as I can. It’s so tempting to fall back into the routine of staying in bed for several more hours. So far I am winning the fight each morning, but I worry this will not last long.
Fighting to keep depression from taking control
Depression tends to have so much control over my life. Once it starts to sink in, everything seems like a fight. It’s hard to get up in the mornings. It is hard to go to sleep at night. Nothing feels worthwhile and everything seems like too much trouble.
When I say nothing and everything, I am only slightly being hyperbolic. Most things seem like too much trouble, and I am not finding anything truly enjoyable. I need to find a way to get my depression under control before it steals my mornings. It is well on its way to doing just that.
Has depression changed your sleep patterns? I would love to hear about your experience. Please share a comment below.
Do you experience painsomnia?