The Fear of Going Abroad with Insomnia

For years I have had trouble with sleep. But my insomnia truly began once my ankylosing spondylitis symptoms started in 2020. Since then, I have not been abroad and have a fear of traveling with insomnia.

Staycations with insomnia

I’ve traveled around Ireland. Each time I’ve been nervous. Nervous about whether I will sleep, or if the bed will be comfortable. Since I was close to home, I always had the security of knowing I could go home if needed – which has happened.

A few months back, I went to West Cork with my family. Every year since I was about 10 years old, I would go abroad with my mam, my aunt, and my grandparents. We would spend quality time together making fantastic memories. Unfortunately, COVID-19 put a stop to this.

Last September, the 5 of us headed to West Cork for the weekend. This is about an hour and a half away from where I live. We arrived on Friday and had a lovely day together. After an evening of eating, drinking, laughing, and making memories it was time for bed.

Fear of leaving early

I hopped into bed, and I knew instantly I wasn’t going to sleep. The bed was so hard. Too hard for me to sleep in. I tried everything; lying on the floor, putting more blankets on the bed to make it softer but nothing helped. I spent the night awake and frustrated. I was so upset; I knew I had to go home.

I tested all the beds, but I knew I couldn’t spend another night there. My back was too sore. I was in absolute agony. I spent Saturday with my family and began my journey home before it got dark. I felt sad that I had to leave my family due to pain. But they understood.

New traveling fears – pain

At the end of April, I went to Alcudia, Majorca, with my family for my first holiday abroad with insomnia. This is like our second home. We went here every year before COVID-19 came along. I feel grateful that after a few years I am able to go back there with my mom, aunt, and grandparents. It will be like old times.

So, I have a few fears about going abroad mostly to do with my pain, such as; how will I deal with the airport and being on a plane sitting for a few hours, and other things but I’m not going to bore you with that. After all, this article is about sleep and not chronic pain. Even though the 2 do interlink.

Fearing lack of sleep

A big fear of mine is sleep, or more so, the lack of sleep.

The biggest fear is what I will do if the bed is uncomfortable. I emailed the hotel explaining my condition and asked for a soft mattress. So, hopefully, it won't be too soft. I’m sharing a hotel room with my mom. What will I do if I can’t sleep? I don’t want to disrupt my mom while she is sleeping. When I don’t sleep, I become very cranky. I do not want to be cranky on my holidays – or around my family.

I’m seeing my doctor before I go, and I will share my concerns with her.

How have you dealt with being on holiday with insomnia? Please share a comment.