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Horrible insomnia for many many years

I'm in my 60s and have struggled with insomnia for decades. I can't seem to settle my mind down enough to drift off. I'm having a horrible time.

There have been times in the past when my dr would prescribe zopiclone, but not often, and now, not at all.

A few years ago, I was sent to an overnight sleep study at the local hospital and did manage to fall asleep for an hour and 40 minutes. They determined there was nothing physically wrong keeping me awake and that my problem is sleep anxiety. I struggle relaxing enough to drift off and they suggested CBTi (cognitive behavioural therapy for insomnia). Problem is I can't afford it - it's $140 an hour!

At night I take 300mg melatonin, magnesium, 500mg gabapentin, 150mg trazadone and a 50 mg THC gummy. My dr won't prescribe sleep meds and I'm at a total loss as to what to do. 🤷‍♀️ I am really really struggling with this as nothing seems to be working for me.

I need to convince myself that I really look forward to going to bed but truth be told, I don't. I dread it. I need to totally change my thought process regarding sleep. Every morning when I wake up, I immediately start worrying that I might not be able to sleep that night. And then, of course, it usually ends up taking me several hours to fall asleep. And then it starts getting light out --- ugh.

I just hate this. Any ideas on what might help me stop worrying about getting to sleep?

Thanks for reading this.

  1. Nope. 🤷‍♀️ So I'm now trying to convince myself that a high percentage of women in their 60's are also struggling with insomnia, so I'm definitely not alone. And I'm hoping that by feeling less alone, it'll help alleviate the anxiety of being awake...

    1. No. He's actually pretty useless and plans to retire in two years. 🤷‍♀️ but then I won't have any doctor. And people up here are often on a waitlist for a dr for 4 or 5 years. Our health care system is really struggling...

      1. I'm surprised that your thyroid hasn't been checked in so long, especially given your previous borderline results. I'm sure it varies from doctor to doctor, but I am a younger woman and my thyroid has always been checked as part of my annual bloodwork. Since you can't switch doctors, it's so important that you and your doctor share the decisionmaking role in your care ... I would encourage you to express your concerns and if you really don't make any progress, perhaps you can escalate things to the practice/clinic head or some other supervisor. You deserve to be supported.

        Re: CBT, generally it is meant to be used as short-term therapy. While it's not ideal, I wonder if even one or two sessions can help you get started on the road to peace. That said, I understand how exorbitant all of this is financially. You have to do what you feel is best.

        We also have some articles with tips from CBT that might help:


        https://insomnia.sleep-disorders.net/cbt
        https://insomnia.sleep-disorders.net/clinical/how-to-succeed-at-cbti


        There are others. I figured I would just pass along as few for you to consider.

        We're here for you! Keep doing the best you can. -Melissa, team member

        1. Thanks for your reply. There isn't a clinic head or supervisor because it's private practice. ... And I agree. He really needs to recheck my thyroid! ... I will definitely check out your cbt links. Thanks!

      2. Thank you for your reply. Much appreciated!
        I agree that an anti-anxiety med would probably help me. The problem is that my doctor is against most meds and up here (in Canada), you're stuck with the doctor you have. You can't switch. ... I suspect I'm probably hyper-thyroid and would like my T3 and T4 checked again but my dr would need to agree to check that. I was checked about 30 years ago and was borderline hyperthyroid but he thought it unnecessary to put me on meds since it was only borderline. Hopefully he will agree to test it when I see him next. I have such a horrible time relaxing. Insomnia has such a big impact on my life.

        1. Hi . I hope the initiatives to improve the healthcare system in Canada begin to have an impact soon and that you will eventually have some choices. Can you afford private care for anxiety treatment or, even if you can, are there private psychiatrists near you? If money is not an issue, you might also try online private care. Thinking of you. - Lori (Team Member)

        2. Sadly, I could never afford private care. It's hard to believe how horrible health care has gotten in Canada. I was just reading how one in five adults in Canada no longer have a family doctor. 🙁

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