No sleep for 3 nights out of the past 5.
Hi,
First of all, I've been under a lot of stress recently with my dad dying a few weeks ago (who I had been living with) and my mother having to go into a care home due to her dementia.
Now I'm suffering from sleep problems, and specifically getting to sleep in the first place, which I have only very rarely suffered from in the past.
For the past 5 nights, I've had completely sleepless nights for 3 of them. I have a sleepless night, followed by a full night of sleep, then another sleepless night etc. However, before going to bed I can drop off to sleep usually when sitting at my computer or watching the TV, but then when I go to bed I might not sleep at all. So it seems my insomnia is driven purely by anxiety, with the source of my anxiety being predominantly the fact I can't get to sleep. So a catch 22 situation. Will this eventually end?
Hi, thank you for your kind words. My father died 6 weeks ago and it did cause issues with my sleeping in the week or two that followed, which eventually got back to normalish... But these 3 sleepless nights in the past 5 days I'm sure are mainly caused by the fact I wasn't feeling particularly tired when I went to bed 5 days ago. That in addition to all the other bad things that have happened to me recently, ended up with me getting no sleep at all that night. That considerably elevated my anxiety and will be responsible for the 2 subsequent sleepless nights.
I've just got up, and it was indeed a much better night! I spoke to a woman for an hour from the sleep charity last night, which helped. Although maybe I slept fine as I never slept at all the previous night and my body's catching up. But normally, I sleep for about 1-3 hours before briefly waking up, and this happens all night (at least for the past 2 years or so). But last night I slept for about 5.5 hours solid before waking up about 5.30am, then going back to sleep again. Whether I'll sleep tonight is another question. But I do feel more calm about the whole issue. 
That's wonderful,
! Fingers cross for tonight! - Lori (Team Member)
I am so sorry for the loss of your father,
, and for the situation with your mother. My mother also sufferered from dementia. Placing her in a home was a difficult and heartbreaking decision, but we could not possibly take care of her on our own. I feel for you. Given that you know what triggered your insomnia and that it is a new problem for you, chances are good that you will get back to a healthy sleep schedule in time. The best approach to breaking the insomnia cycle in a situation like this is often a combination of therapy and medication. Treatment can range from learning ,coping and relaxation skills on your own and using natural sleep enhancers like melatonin to getting prescription medication from your doctor and seeing a therapist who specializes in sleep disorders and/or grief. It really depends on how much help you think you need. Here is a wonderful article from one of our advocates who addressed her anxiety and insomnia through therapy: https://insomnia.sleep-disorders.net/living/anxiety-driven. Here is another article about apps that can help you slow your thinking at night and sleep: https://insomnia.sleep-disorders.net/living/better-sleep-tip. One trick I use when my mind is racing is counting backward from 200. Focuing on the numbers prevents me from thinking about anything else, though I admit that I often have to restart a few times after letting my mind wander. I hope the solution is an easy as counting or using an app for you, but therapy might also be wise given everything you are going through. Just having a nonjudgemental third party to vent to can be a huge relief. I hope this helps and that others chime in with more ideas. Keep me post if you don't mind. I will be thinking of you. Gentle hugs. - Lori (Team Member)
